A Black Feminism | Womanism Blog

Monthly Archives: March 2012

Due to being stalked by my mother’s ex-husband, I am considering moving and privatizing/deleting this blog.

I know this will be an inconvenience not only to me but to everyone who follows my posts. I appreciate you but this is a choice I may have to make since this stalker is subscribed to my blog and stalking me and my family in every way he can. There is no way I can block my blog from his visitations. I don’t like feeling like I have to rearrange my life because of his behavior and harassment but I do not want this person in my life at all.

Should I decide to move and delete or move and privatize this blog, I will ask that you send me an e-mail and I will give you the new blog address if I see that you are currently subscribed.

Evermore,

Queen of Queens


In high school, you hear all your teachers and all the so-called grown folks talking about getting prepared for the “the real world”, for “real life”.

But what is the “real world”?

I recently got my first “real” job since graduating from college in 2010. I like the work, it makes me feel confident because its something I feel can do. However, its alarming and infuriating how similar high school is to my job.

Same bullshittery dealing with many coworkers and managers that you get from condescending teachers, immature brats trying to impress, and bullies. I never believed it when I saw it in movies, but “the real world”(TM) is very much like high school.

College was the greater world of high school. So work is like the greater, greater world of high school I guess. That’s if you manage to get a job.

The “real world” is not even “the real world”. I feel like a cog among cogs in a great big clock sitting in some rich person’s living for decoration.

Sometimes I’m jealous of people who work well in these constructed environments and make it look easy; I wish I had their propensity for “accepting things the way they are” and learning how to operate within the system.

But most of the time, I just think its sad. I see how society is. However, that doesn’t stop me from seeing how things could be, should be, ought to be, or whatever, and always being in the frame of mind wanting, needing, and trying to be a catalyst for change by my very presence.

Looking back on all the “on how things are [in “the real world”(TM)]” advice from school, I can see why society keeps rolling the way it does, under the guise of order, routine, and systemic process. We’re taught from day one exactly how to operate like good little cogs.

smdh,

Taviante Queens


In my stories, I have never written a character who is my skin color or lighter. All of my characters range from several shades browner than me to dark ebony-brown shades in skin tone.

Growing up in Atlanta of the Deep South, I was surrounded by Black people all the time and lived in working class/poor Black neighborhoods, so most of the direct interactions I had with white people up until I went to college came from analyzing television, reading and learning about their treachery in history class, from warnings I got from my family, and through lived experience with the system/society in general.

I appreciated and saw the beauty and glory of darker brownness in many of it’s manifestations through the people around me. These darker browns are the default Black and the default humyn being in my mind, even as I am aware that many people around the world have been brainwashed/socialized/browbeaten into believing that white is the default humyn being. Even as I was aware that we live in a world that tries to destroy and denigrate the spirits, minds, potential and bodies of darker brown Black folks.

My sister and mom (and my brother—RIP) are all darker than me and my uncles are too (aunts, not that much), which is why I was only part aware that I wasn’t the same tone as them. I never thought I was different from other Black people or should be treated differently. Additionally, my sister and I are twins so until she started calling me “white” when we were little, I didn’t realize there was any big fucking difference honestly.

Growing up, I wanted to see more fantastical stories with darker brown/dark-skinned people in them as three dimensional main characters and heroes, the people I thought I looked like, so I began writing them.

People around my skin tone or lighter just don’t occur to me. In my imagination, there’s medium brown and there’s a spectrum of darker than medium brown, there’s white people/peachy white people, and generally other people of color and the various skin tones that they appear in according to my observations.



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